


A Private Goodbye

by Scy1he



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Gen, Implied/Referenced Suicide, My First AO3 Post, No beta we die like Wilbur in L'manberg
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-27
Updated: 2021-01-27
Packaged: 2021-03-12 17:47:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29014572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Scy1he/pseuds/Scy1he
Summary: In the end, none of them truly understand him.
Relationships: Clay | Dream & Luke | Punz, Clay | Dream & Sam | Awesamdude
Comments: 12
Kudos: 133





	A Private Goodbye

**Author's Note:**

> TW: Implied suicide
> 
> This is my first post. English is not my native language. Hope you enjoy it anyway ( •̀ ω •́ )

Punz stood at the top of his tower, looking down the land of SMP. The once grassy green land was polluted by the red vines. He heard the ladder creaked and turned around to find Sam.

‘ You need me?’ Punz asked. 

‘ No, just need a break from that mess down there,’ Sam sighed. His arm was wrapped by red vines as well, probably because of all the time working around the egg.‘ Just as I thought all the chaos ended by locking Dream in there, it only seemed to get worse.’

‘ Do you think all of this is planned?’ Punz sighed. Sam frowned in confusion. ‘ Like he planned all the wars, from everyone going against him to getting locked in his own prison. Or maybe even earlier.’

‘ ...that’s incredibly unsettling.’

The two men sat on the edge of the tower in silence. Dangling their leg off the edge. They recalled what had happened over the past months, and went even further back. It seemed that the force that pushed all the events was always the same person, Dream.

Punz felt a shiver climb up his back. The nights were getting colder.

‘ But why would he lock himself up?’ Sam asked. ‘ You were by his side for the longest time. Had he told you anything about his plan?’

‘ Not really. About a month ago, he told me who he wanted to lock up. Not specifically who, but what kind of person they are. Highly capable. Someone he can’t kill. Someone who is dangerous.’

‘ Exactly who Dream is,’ Sam groaned as he buried his head into his palm. ‘ We should have known.’

‘ Now we can only wait for what he had set up. Great. Just as we thought everything was resolved, Dream was still pulling the strings.’

Punz watched his friend rant about the situation. He was right, they could only wait for everything to roll in as they could only watch, helpless.

Goosebumps appeared on his arm. The nights were really getting colder.

‘ Do you think Dream meant it when he said he didn’t care about anything?’

‘ He doesn’t seem like a person who would care about personal feelings. Perhaps in the past, but definitely not now.’

‘ Hear me out.’ Sam raised his eyebrow. ‘ He said everything he did was to reunite the whole server-’

‘ By manipulating children?’

‘ He wanted to become the primary enemy of everything. He hoped this way he could reunite everyone. He even told me to switch sides because he wanted me to be safe,’ Punz sighed. ‘ I don’t know how many words I can take from him. What if it’s just another way for him to emotionally manipulate me? The worst is, what if he wasn't lying?’

Punz felt his eyes start to sting. It’s quite windy up here.

‘ … I overheard Tommy and Dream’s conversation when he visited Dream. When Tommy asked what he missed most, Dream lashed out and told Tommy to leave. He sees attachment as weakness, he could have just said no at that moment but he didn’t,’ Sam said. 

‘ Because he still cared,’ Punz breathed in shapely. ‘ I wanted to believe him so much but I can’t help but wonder if it’s just another manipulation.’

‘ In the end, none of us knew a thing about him!’ 

Punz threw a punch at the air. His nose started to sting as well. It’s probably the wind.

‘ As much as you doubt his intention. You still care about him, don’t you?’ Sam asked.

‘ How can I not? He used to be the kindest person on the server. Giving resources to everyone. You remember how much he pampered Tubbo and how much he helped Tommy to train. The reason Tommy can actually put up a fight was because of him,’ Punz sighed for the third time in the past 15 minutes. ‘ When did it change?’

He wanted the simpler days in the past. Where there was no wars, no nations, no sides. Just a bunch of friends exploring the world and messing around. Occasionally causing havoc with each other. But in the end, everyone would gather around a campfire at night, talking about the day.

Perhaps that’s why Dream did all of this. 

Most of the old members missed the past days on the server. Except Dream was the only one who actually sought out to bring it back.

***

Dream was writing when he found out a thin red vine that appeared at the corner of his cell. He walked over and raised his leg.

_ Wait! _

**_Why are you here? You shouldn’t be able to enter._ **

_ I should be the one asking you. Why are you here? These walls mean nothing to you. _

**_None of your business._ **

_ Wait wait wait wait wait! Don’t you want revenge? They locked you in! _

**_Correction, I locked myself in._ **

_ What! Why! _

**_None of your business._ **

_ Wah! Why are you so mean to a fellow Dreamon. _

**_Leave. I’m not dealing with another gremlin._ **

_ You are so mean! I thought elders were supposed to care for the younglings! _

**_Don’t talk to me like that._ **

_ Wait wait wait! I really have something to ask _

**_…_ **

_ I want to ask for help.  _

**_…_ **

_ Wahhhhh! Stop. _

**_Are Dreamons getting stupider by each generation?_ **

_ You are Dreamon too!  _

**_And I’m the first generation. My statement doesn’t apply._ **

_ Wah! You are so mean!  _

**_…_ **

_ But why won’t you help me! _

**_The land you are on is the very land I created and swore to protect. You came here and polluted my land, causing a mess. And ask me to help you to take over the land._ **

_ I-I was helping you! You see I am a bit of a mind manipulator!  _

**_You dare to read my mind?_ **

_ No no no n-no… _

**_…_ **

_ Maybe a bit. _

**_…_ **

_ But I didn’t go so deep! I couldn’t too! But I knew you wanted the past days back. You want peace, am I correct? _

**_…_ **

_ I can help you! I can help you stop them from causing chaos! From breaking the rules! _

**_By mind controlling them?_ **

_ Well- _

**_You thought I hadn't thought of that?_ **

_ Well no- _

**_I don’t want to use my power anymore. The more I use them, the more I drown into the lust for chaos. I’ve broken free and understand how much more life means. I’m not going back._ **

_ Why is that a bad thing? _

**_Why do you need to know?_ **

_ … _

**_What are you doing?_ **

_ Ha! I knew it! It’s because you care about them! That’s why you don’t use your powers because you don't want to hurt your ‘friends’. _

**_…_ **

_ Why would you even think they are your friends? You say I’m stupid but you are even more stupid! _

**_…_ **

_ Wahhhh! I’m sorry. _

**_They were my friends. Which is why I’m barricading myself from them._ **

_ They aren’t- _

**_But they were._ ** __

_ But can’t you see. They don’t care about you! They are celebrating your loss! _

**_But I care._ **

_ Ugh! _

**_Now leave._ **

Dream stomped his feet on the vine. The vine was turned to dust immediately.

**_A tip for you. They are tougher than they seem._ **

If they are united.

_ *** _

The weather was beautiful. Dream smiled slightly when he finally got to breath fresh air after being stuck in the boring black cell for so long. The sky was bluer than he remembered, or it was just because he had never seen any colours other than pitch black.

He was allowed a day to visit the outside world after being locked in for so long. Before that, he had been helping Sam with collecting resources to prove his obedience. So he did. He helped with resource gathering, even giving advice on how to stop the egg. In the end, Sam was convinced and allowed him a day of visitation. The condition being Dream would need to wear a handcuff on his right wrist with Punz and Sam guarding him.

Punz had thought Dream would change a lot after being in the prison. But he didn’t seem to change one bit. He could even say he was more relaxed. The ever tense posture was gone but the bags under his eyes definitely got darker. Probably because of the lack of bed in the prison cell.

Yet, he seemed content.

‘ Where do you want to go?’ Sam asked tonelessly.

‘ I want to visit my bass. I have something I want to give you,’ Dream smiled softly.

The two let Dream lead them to a waterfall. Sam was on guard, one hand held onto the leash connecting the handcuff and the other resting on his sword. Punz was tense. He still didn’t know how to feel about the ex-leader. He would kill to take a look at what's going on his brilliant brain. The most relaxed was surprisingly Dream. He genuinely seemed to be happy, for once.

They stopped in front of the waterfall. Sam and Punz looked at Dream in confusion as there was no base insight. Dream was over to a lamppost and pulled a lever on it. The water slowly retracted and revealed a staircase.

Sam raised an eyebrow while Punz hung his mouth wide.

‘ You know redstone?’

‘ It’s just a simple wiring and dispenser, nothing big,’ Dream chuckled and led them up the stairs.

The staircase led them into a cave. The cave was transformed into a cozy home. Most of the floor was replaced with wood planks and carpets. The walls were still stone. Lanterns that were burnt out a long time ago hung from the ceiling but the room was still bright as there was an opening on the other side, allowing natural light to come in.

‘ Do I need to light up the lanterns?’ Dream asked while the other two shook their head slightly, still entranced by the small home.

There was a room that was a step higher than the main room. There was a bed inside where a cat with patches of colour laid. The bedroom didn’t have much furniture but a nightstand and a lantern. The main room was also vacant because of the lack of furniture. There was only a crafting table, an Ender Chest, some furnaces and chests, and bookshelves surrounding an enchantment table. 

The room was normal. It’s nothing special but knowing the owner of it, it’s too normal.

Too human.

‘ Ah, here it is,’ Dream smiled as he pulled out a pair of swords. He unsheathed one of them. The blade was made of a crystal-like material and the handle was dark oak. Dream swung it a few times, a yellow trail was following each swing of the blade. He struck the sword on the floor, letting out a loud ‘clank’. A flash of yellow almost blinded the two guards. When the light was gone, yellow petals were left on the floor. 

Sam quickly snapped out of the initial shock. He unsheathed his sword and pointed at his throat and Dream immediately raised his hand. Punz also laid his hand on the sword, ready to engage in battle

‘ What are you doing?’ Sam warned with a threatening voice.

‘ Sorry, I should’ve told you first.’ Dream sheathed the sword again. He spun the sword, pointed the end of the handles at the guards. ‘ I want you to have these.’

Sam slowly lowered his sword warily but he didn’t reach out for the sword. Punz was hesitant but ultimately reached out under Dream’s encouraging stare.

Punz pulled out the sword that Dream tried out. The blade was as intact as new. He wondered what enchantment did Dream put on.

‘ Come on, Sam. Punz already took his,’ Dream nudged the sword at the unwavering guard playfully. In the end, he gave in and pulled out the sword.

‘ Are you done here then?’ Sam asked.

‘ No questions? How surprising,’ Dream teased. He can practically see a question mark on his face. He sighed,’ I trust you two. No, I can only trust you two by this point.’

Dream walked towards the opening. They stepped out of the cave where a beautiful flower field of buttercups was. 

‘ I should start from the beginning then,’ Dream sighed. ‘ I am an Elder Dreamon, see it as the first generation of Dreamon. I’ve been wandering in this world for so long until I finally settled down. Here.

‘ People think Dreamons are Satan reincarnated. But in fact, Dreamons are just like every other immortal being. The difference is that the more we use our powers or engage in battles, the more we pieces of humanity are lost. Until it is completely gone, becoming the “Dreamon'' you think we are.’

A meow was heard from behind. The cat they saw on the bed was walking towards them. She walked past Sam and Punz and sat next to Dream, nuzzling her head on his leg. Dream reached down to pet her head, smiling softly.

‘ I was afraid. Many of my kind were lost to the lust for chaos so I decided to settle down here. I swore to not use my power or engage in conflict. But when Tommy started with the pranks and conflicts, I got worried and broke my promises to myself.’

The cat mewled at her master as if sensing the sorrow from him.

‘ I used my power to banish Tommy, then he came back. I did it again, and he came back. So I used another way to punish him.’

‘ The discs,’ Punz filled in.

‘ Yes. Then he got it back. And before I realised it, I had already lost another piece of humanity. I can barely hang on and the coming L’Manberg Independence only worsened the situation. By the time of the first attack, the humanity that was left was unable to overcome my Dreamon.’

‘ So you’ve been in your Dreamon side… the whole time?’ Punz whispered in disbelief.

‘ Yeah. Sometimes I would become lucid, but there’s too little time for me to do anything before the Dreamon side took back my control.’ 

Dream breathed in sharply, holding back a sob. ‘ My actions were irreversible. Everyone on this server already saw me as a villain. So I gave up. I stopped fighting. I became the villain they thought I am. At least this way, everyone can be reunited.’

Dream walked further into the flower field and the guards followed closely. Just then, they realised the flowerbed was actually grown on a cliff. Underneath the cliff was a basin filled with buttercups. 

‘ The egg was a Dreamon as well. A very young one, but it doesn’t make it less powerful,’ Dream said seriously. ‘ I’m not hundred per cent sure if I can defeat it considering it could already breach the prison security,’

‘ What?’ Sam gasped. Suddenly, despair kicked in: all of them on the server is nothing compared to a Dreamon.

‘ I usually channelled my power into the land as a protection, but it would only strengthen the Dreamon at this point as it was constantly draining energy from my land. So I cut ties with it but I trust you will be able to protect this place.’

A gut feeling hit Punz, but he’s not sure what it is.

‘ I used my remaining power to create these two swords. These are extremely powerful and I trust you that you will put it into good use.’

‘ Dream,’ Punz started. ‘ Why us?’

‘As I said, I can only trust you two by this point.’

‘ How can I know you aren’t lying?’ Sam questioned. ‘ You have been pulling the strings, lying, manipulating. How can I know you are not lying now?’

‘ I have no reason to.’

‘ Dream? Why are you telling us this… stuff all a sudden? Why didn’t you tell us earlier?’ Punz asked desperately. All of this information was hurting his brain. 

‘ Because it’s hopeless,’ Dream hissed. ‘ I became the villain. You gathered to stop me. But the next second, you are at each other's throats again. The Eggpire, Snowchester. There is no peace on this server. The ball has started rolling ever since the independence of L’Manberg.’

‘ There are no rules anymore. Griefing, stealing, even killing? No one cares! As long as it benefits their side, no one cares! I’m just a punisher in this world, but then you see me as a heartless person. I tried to maintain peace by ensuring the unity of the members, but then you see me as a tyrant. What am I supposed to do then!’ Dream yelled.

‘ I don’t have the courage to go on anymore. I’m tired.’

‘ Dream, this is irresponsible. With great power comes great responsibility. You can’t just run away-’

‘ Why am I the only one responsible then!’ Sam was cut off by Dream’s outburst. 

‘ I gave up my peaceful life and gave you a place to settle in. I used my powers and gave you safety on this server. I turned myself into the villain to maintain law and order. I gave up my freedom to protect all of you from myself. And I’m irresponsible!’ Dream cried.

The two of them looked at him shocked. They could no longer see an almighty god Dream was, but a wounded animal that was backed to the corner. His once prideful posture was gone, only a walking corpse remained.

The gut feeling hit again.

The cat mewled and nuzzled her head on Dream’s leg. But he didn’t move an inch.

‘ Sam.’ Dream turned around. His mask stared blankly at him. ‘ Thank you for letting me say goodbye.’

‘ What-’

‘ Punz.’ Dream took off his mask. His eyes were teary but he smiled. A genuine, tired smile. ‘ I’ve always seen you more than a mercenary.’ 

Dream opened his arm as he closed his eyes. Sam pulled the leash but Dream's wrist went through the handcuff.

Punz reached out. But he was too late. He was late a long time ago.

He could only watch as he fell. Faster and faster. Like a meteor crashing down the surface of the Earth.

***

A book laid on a lectern. The ink just dried.

**Dear All,**

**Forgive me for being a coward.**

**I’ve done too much wrong even if I believe the goal justifies the means. I’ve lost everything, everyone. Perhaps I deserve it. Perhaps it was meant to be. I’m a Dreamon after all.**

**Forgive me for not being brave enough to be genuine and true. Forgive me for hiding so many secrets. Forgive me for denying the kindness you send me. I’m sorry.**

**To George and Sapnap, I never hated you. You two had stayed by my side for so long. You two are the first one ever to give me friendship. I cannot thank you enough.**

**To Puffy, thank you for being my mother in all but blood. I’m sure I’ve disappointed you. I’m sorry.**

**To Sam, thank you for helping me take care of those two idiots. They must have annoyed you to no end.**

**To Punz, thank you for staying by my side for so so so long. Thank you for not abandoning me even when I’m losing. Thank you for being more than an ally to me, even if this feeling may not be mutual.**

**To all, thank you for being in my ever-lasting life. Forgive me for not saying a proper goodbye and my terrible wording in this letter.**

**Please continue to live for me. I know I’m in no place to give you orders. But please, live a better life than me.**

**For you, the world.**

**With Love,**

**Dream**

***

Buttercups were stained into roses. Giving the godling a hug he was never given. 


End file.
